Words of consolation to losing athletes. SMS that will support you in difficult times. Child’s worldview: fixed or flexible

Fascinated by the beauty of stadiums and rings, the sounds of fanfare and the crackle of fireworks, we watch the Olympics, competitions, championships, matches. The plasticity of perfection, excitement, luck - all this is created by sports people. What value do their victories achieve? Exorbitant loads, fatal breakdowns, fortitude, fear of defeat... The price of victory is life and fate.

Each of us has encountered defeat and failure along the way, because we, regardless of the chosen field of activity, overcome a life-long distance. Essentially, everyone has their own treadmill, boxing ring, Ice Arena and a chess game.

How to survive defeat, how not to lose motivation, where to get the inner strength to rise up, be able to see mistakes and start working on them? What to do when you are overwhelmed with feelings of pain, disappointment, anger, fear and guilt? Guilt for the unjustified expectations of those for whom you are an idol, those who invested energy and time in you, preparing you for the next fight. Club coach mixed martial arts"Banner" Alexey Goremykin believes that defeat is a turning point, but not a decisive moment for an athlete.

“For any athlete, not only in the field of martial arts, defeat is always a turning point in his career. When entering the ring or cage, you must be mentally prepared for any outcome; of course, you only need to tune in to victory, but, unfortunately, defeat is also part of any sport. How the fighter’s career will develop further will depend only on him. It is wrong to decide that this was all you were capable of and you did everything you could. The correct perception of loss is to return to the gym, study mistakes, highlight weak sides and work three times harder.”

The ability to effectively cope with defeat is the key to an athlete’s success. Unfortunately, very often people surrounding the athlete downplay the significance of the current situation. One of the few ways to provide support is to say: “Don’t worry, it’s just an experience, everything will be fine” . But in this way, the feelings of a person who has suffered a sports failure are devalued. This attitude has a negative impact on the athlete’s personality, especially if he is a child, and the chances of coping with this situation are reduced to a minimum. In the event of a sports defeat, it is important to give yourself the opportunity to emotionally experience the situation, in other words, to grieve, because any defeat is a loss, the loss of something important and valuable. On average, this period lasts from several hours to 2-3 days. At this moment, it is very important that a person significant to him is next to the athlete - a parent, coach, psychologist. Next, it is very important to consciously analyze the situation from the perspective of what was done well, despite the negative result. Finding good times and positive moments provides a source of motivation and strength to overcome.

Trainer Alexey Goremykin also believes that there is no need to deny the fact of defeat, but placing emphasis on it is also wrong.

“I would advise you not to focus on this. Understand and accept that this happens and there is no escape from it. In any case, you need to have a good rest and go to the gym with renewed vigor. Carefully analyze the fight with the coach and team. Work on mistakes and tune in new fight. An indicator of the correct attitude towards a loss is victory in the next match.”

It is necessary to rely on real actions and facts. Afterwards, you should highlight one or two specific problems that prevented you from achieving a positive result. These problems are points of application of forces in the upcoming preparation; one task will be a priority, the second will be additional, in case there is a failure in work on the first. It is important to realize the fact that there are always mistakes, it is important to see them and find resources to correct them. A mistake does not mean the fact that you are not capable! It is very important to exclude the concept of “unlucky”, because a person who is unlucky will not change anything about himself, this closes the possibility of analysis, and this is the first step to the next loss. A paradoxical, but justified step is to develop a constructive action plan in case of defeat: “What will I do if I lose again?” For example: what will I try to change in my behavior and my preparation. Uncertainty (fear of the unknown) is removed, which reduces the possible fear of failure and increases confidence in the possibility of solving the problem. To avoid defeat, in some cases you must first accept the fact of its possibility. In order for this task not to be a setup for defeat, you need to develop a plan not for the defeat itself, but for actions after a possible loss. This is a fairly in-depth analysis that is best performed together with a psychologist, since effectively experiencing a defeat requires time and special skills.

In conclusion, I would like to quote the words of one of the most successful athletes of our time Michael Jordan:

“I've lost almost 300 games in my career... 26 times I've been called upon to make the game-winning shot and missed. I have failed in my life over and over again. And this is exactly what made me successful. You are not a loser until you give up!”

This is how champions are born!

The article was prepared by: Alena Samarina, head of the sports psychology department of the Mixed Martial Arts Club “Styag”

Special thanks to the coach of KSE “Styag” Alexey Goremykin

In the life of an athlete there are not only victories and success, every athlete faces defeat, failure and loss. And, as a rule, people around and close to you say, “Don’t worry! This is bullshit!". This belief is not correct. Minimizing the experience of defeat and failure can significantly affect the future career of an athlete.

Each athlete experiences defeats and failures in his own way, some do it alone, and some do it in the presence of a person. But every athlete must feel the grief of failure.

Psychologists say that an athlete will need from 2-3 to 48 hours to overcome the situation of a lost competition. After which it is necessary to begin performing tasks that are aimed at processing the situation of defeat. Many athletes, in case of defeat, seek the help of good psychologists.

Despite the defeat, the athlete must identify those moments that he did well. Correct and positive moments in competition raise the athlete’s self-esteem and give impetus to overcome the current situation.

What should the athlete do?

The athlete must highlight specific problems that prevent him from winning. These are the issues that will need to be worked on. There should not be more than two such problems. If there are more of them, this will not increase the athlete’s self-confidence, but will only worsen the situation.

Words such as "Tough luck!" is the first step to the next failure. In this case, the athlete will wait for those competitions in which he is lucky. And this is not the right position. There are no coincidences in sports. If you lose, then you need to admit your mistakes and work on them.

Everyone makes mistakes, and an athlete must understand that mistakes do not mean his inability.

Admitting your own mistakes is not something shameful; on the contrary, it should provide an incentive to further work on yourself.

If an athlete does not find mistakes, then this threatens to stop creative growth and development. Therefore, it is very important to set yourself a more difficult task in time.

The results of experiencing failure and defeat lead to the fact that the athlete eventually ceases to be afraid of negative emotions and losses. This increases the likelihood of winning.

Author of the article: psychotherapist, psychiatrist, art therapist Sopot Olga Pavlovna. Provides individual counseling and psychotherapy. Work experience 22 years.

Parents must be multifunctional, and cooks, and educators, and stylists, and, of course, a storehouse of morality, as well as the best psychologists and support for the baby. There will be many situations in life, both joyful and not so happy, but only mom and dad are able to support and provide the necessary psychological assistance to their precious baby.

The question that many parents are interested in is how to support their child after a loss in sports, and it is also relevant at any time and at any age. It is very important to be able not only to stimulate the child, but also to lend your reliable shoulder at the right moment.

Supporting a child after a loss in sports – when to pay special attention

Athletes, whether they are professional or very young, need the support of their loved ones in difficult times of defeat. The most important thing is to be there in the first few hours, or even days. Based on sports literature, many coaches and psychologists famous teams, they say that in the first 3 days after any failure, a person needs immediate, enhanced support, otherwise he can withdraw into himself and never recover from the defeat and give up sports.

What not to say to a child after losing in sports

The most basic mistake is convincing the child that losing means nothing, that there is absolutely no point in worrying about defeat, that everything will pass and it will be better next time. Worrying about a fiasco is a completely normal phenomenon, as it should be, do not let the child withdraw into himself, but also do not try to praise, obsessively proving that the incident is over. It is very important that after a loss lessons are learned, the necessary conclusions must be drawn.

What to say to support a child after a loss in sports

If you are thinking about how to support a child after a loss in sports, do not try to shield him, do not pretend that everything is fine, sit down and discuss the loss together. If there is a video, watch it, it’s completely normal to discuss the defeat, discuss every detail, so that later you can correct everything in training and not get caught like this again.

Every failure should be taken seriously, but rationally, without noise and shouting, hysterics and impulsive decisions to leave and abandon everything. It's like school, I couldn't write test for the highest score - let's learn and try again until we bring everything to perfection.

Explain to the child that this is the same thing, and that after a bad grade, children do not run away from school and lessons, but on the contrary, they study what they got burned by. Here the situation is similar - losing, this is not a reason to leave, but an excellent opportunity to figure out your weak points and turn them into a hidden “weapon”. When everyone expects that the kid will make the same mistake next time, he will take it and show a master class. Stay there, don’t feel sorry, don’t humiliate, but just tell us that you can always make delicious, refreshing lemonade from the lemons that life throws at us. And the question of how to support a child after a defeat in sports will no longer seem difficult and acute. This will only be an opportunity to discuss what can be improved and improved.

“When it’s hard for me, I always remind myself that if I give up, it won’t get better,” said world boxing legend Mike Tyson. We have selected the most motivating statements from famous Russian and foreign athletes so that you never give up.

Mike Tyson

If a person gets up after falling, it's not physics, it's character.

Mike Tyson, from the age of ten, helped his older comrades steal, and suffered beatings at home. Mike decided to become a boxer when he was 13, and won his first victory in the ring at 15.

Without discipline you are nothing! Someday you will meet a tough guy who can withstand your most best shots. And he will continue to advance because he is strong. Do not lose your fortitude and courage. This is the time when discipline comes into play.

Tyson will face problems with the law, he will be treated for alcohol and drug addiction. Nevertheless, “Iron Mike” will become one of the most famous boxers in the world and set several world records.

The coach always told me: “You have to beat everyone, you are able to do it, but what happens when they beat you, can you handle it?” And I know I can.

Muhammad Ali

The impossible is nothing.

Cassius Clay, better known as Muhammad Ali, in his first Olympic Games flew wearing a parachute - the future superhero suffered from aerophobia and refused to board a plane without “safety net.” Then there was an Olympic gold medal and three world heavyweight titles.

The most difficult fight is when you have to fight laziness for happiness.

Ali was a pacifist who refused to join the army, he advocated for the rights of African Americans and threw his Olympic medal into the river after a waitress refused to serve him a glass of water because of the color of his skin. He is an idol of several generations and the author of the famous phrase “the impossible is possible,” which in the original sounds even more precisely: “the impossible is nothing.”

Champions do not become gyms. A champion is born from what is inside a person - desires, dreams, goals.

Lev Yashin

Anyone who wants to achieve convincing victories must try to jump above his head

Olympic champion and World Cup bronze medalist Lev Yashin was the only goalkeeper to ever receive the Golden Ball, a prize awarded annually to the best European football player. This man knew what it meant to not give up. When at the very beginning of Yashin’s career, football did not work out, he did not leave the sport, switched to hockey and even achieved serious success there - he won the USSR Cup.

Any, even the happiest finish is only a precursor to the next start, and past victories, no matter how significant they may be, do not provide any additional privileges.

Pele

The more difficult the victory was, the more happy you are that you achieved it.

Pele (real name Edson Arantis do Nascimento), from a simple Brazilian boy who worked as a boot shiner, grew up in best football player XX century. His nickname - the nickname Pele was given to him by one of his friends as a child - turned into a name known to everyone. He won three World Cups and received the unofficial title of King of Football.

Success is not an accident. It's about hard work, perseverance, training, study, sacrifice and most of all, loving what you do or are learning to do.

Larisa Latynina

Teach an athlete to fight to the end for any place, and he will be able to fight for first.

Gymnast Larisa Latynina has nine gold, five silver and four bronze olympic medals. Her name is included in the Guinness Book of Records and in the list of outstanding athletes that adorns the Olympic Hall of Fame in New York.

Never think that you have lost a competition if you still have one last exercise left.

Latynina became the world champion while she was four weeks pregnant. And two months later she returned to the sport again.

One day, while performing a difficult jump on a log, I landed on top of it and broke my tailbone. As a result, I couldn’t sit for a month and stood against the wall during lectures at the institute. But I didn't cry. You can cry from pain, resentment, even from fatigue, but I never cried - neither in training nor in competitions.

On this topic:

Michael Jordan

I can accept failure, but I cannot accept not trying.

The most famous basketball player on the planet, Michael Jordan, knows how to achieve his goals. He's a two-timer Olympic champion, six-time champion of the coolest basketball league - the NBA and one of the richest athletes.

If anything moves me forward, it is only my weakness, which I hate and turn into my strength.

Jordan managed not only to become one of the most popular athletes and turn his name into a brand, but also to earn a fortune. Forbes magazine estimated his 2015 income at $110 million.

When you go towards your goal, an obstacle stands in your way. I've encountered them, everyone has. But don't let obstacles stop you. When faced with a wall, do not turn back, do not retreat. Find a way to overcome this barrier, work on it.

Train at home like the pros with Hollywood trainer Jim Barcena! More details

Kostya Tszyu

Even difficulties in life are needed for something.

When in an interview absolute champion world boxing Kostya Tszyu asked about his life credo, he replied that his motto is “never give up.” In life, an athlete who has won 270 out of 282 fights prefers not to use force. But in training and in the ring he gives it his all.

Someone says that I am talented, my greatest talent was that I could work more than others. Plow.

Tszyu believes that failures can teach you a lot. If you can handle them.

A lost fight always makes you realize that you are doing something wrong.

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The psychology of the loser in competitions

In every sports competition Only one strongest is revealed - this is the winner. Many other participants are forced to feel the bitterness of defeat. Failures at the last decisive stage of the competition are especially acute. They usually cause a destructive stress state ( distress), which is quite difficult for an athlete to overcome without the help of a coach, psychologist, doctor and teammates.

Depending on the internal attitude of the participants, experiences and thoughts about losing can have a sharp emotional coloring and degree of expression. Some may be satisfied that among the many strongest they were not the last; other participants will consider it an achievement that they were able to enter the top ten or top five. Finally, there are those who are satisfied with the improvement of their personal results, regardless of their place among other participants in the competition.

Experience of defeat Thus, it can have different shades and intensity, can be dramatized in different ways in the mind and be perceived by the athlete either as defeat and disappointment, loss or failure, or as a mistake, an accidental failure, or as a fact of participation and acquisition of new sports experience, etc. The nature of his motivation at the start depends on how an athlete feels about a possible unfavorable outcome of the competition, which is expressed in two types - motivation to achieve success or the opposing motivation to avoid failure. What type of motivation dominates in the athlete’s mind? This depends on the level of the athlete's aspirations and his competitive experience, which the coach should be well aware of.

It is indisputable that the loser experiences a range of negative emotions, expressing dissatisfaction with himself, and in some cases with his coach and team. This state of internal conflict, the essence of which lies in the failure to achieve actually planned goals, is called frustration. The severity of the frustration state is enhanced by the fear of public evaluation, especially if the defeat was the result of an absurd mistake, which is unusual for athletes of this class. This is why you see the tears of losers much more often than the tears of winners. Constant or too frequent failures pose a serious threat of loss of confidence in one’s abilities, reduce the level of aspirations, weaken motivation in the fight for victory, lower the athlete’s self-esteem and interest in the sport itself, which ultimately shapes the psychology of a loser, who supposedly always haunted by “evil fate”. They say about such athletes: “he’s broken.” Therefore, cultivating frustration tolerance is a necessary and important task in the psychological preparation of athletes.

The positive educational impact of losing in competitions is the athlete’s realistic assessment of his “Possibilities.” Everything must be analyzed - first of all, one’s own will, the level of skill achieved and the entire training system. The coach is obliged to encourage his athletes to such an analysis, to discuss with the athletes the reasons for failures - this is the essence of the educational function of the coach.

Often losers look for the reasons for the loss not in themselves, but in external unfavorable circumstances, attributing failure to the coach, weather, equipment, random circumstances, and team sports such a “scapegoat” most often becomes one’s playing partners. This gives rise to the possibility of a conflict - intrapersonal (the athlete and his inner “I”) or interpersonal (the athlete with the team or coach). Consequently, the athlete’s consciousness needs constant monitoring and pedagogical correction by the coach, which helps to achieve higher competitive emotional stability in athletes. This can be helped by analysis and an objective assessment of what the athlete must do himself, what he can do with the help of a coach, psychologist or teammates. Analysis of the results of competitions should show the athlete his mistakes and weaknesses, and positively set him up for self-improvement. This will allow you to make adjustments to the training, aiming at eliminating weak points in preparation for competitions.

A clear understanding of mistakes and reasons for loss always helps to mobilize an athlete to achieve success in upcoming competitions. The negative psycho-emotional state after a defeat must be eliminated as quickly as possible. Otherwise, it will negatively affect the entire course of preparation. This can be helped by all kinds of switching, relaxation and suggestions, compensatory activities and rest, entertainment, lectures and a visual demonstration of an increase in the level of preparedness, as well as active group emotional identification, which consists in organizing joint cultural leisure. The immediate goal of using these methods is to block frustration, restore mental energy and the previous level of self-esteem of the individual. Thus, post-competitive mental regulation and management of mental state are important and no less significant than all activities in the pre-competitive and competitive period.